Journey Into Happiness

In this deeply honest, heart-opening and hope-filled conversation, Dr Nat welcomes Denice Buryn—Wholistic Practitioner, Massage Therapist, and Energy Healer—to explore what it really takes to move from trauma to post-traumatic growth. Denice shares her raw, unfiltered, courageous journey from early heartbreak, abuse, addiction, single motherhood without support, anxiety and health collapse and the courageous pivot that began with daily meditation, energy clearing, and radical self-honor and led to a grounded, purpose-led life of post-traumatic growth. Denice explains how feeling disconnected from the woman in the mirror became the catalyst to remember her innate worth, set loving boundaries, and rebuild from the inside out.

You’ll hear how a series of small, consistent practices created profound change: daily meditation (including approachable, non-traditional forms), energy clearing, whole-food nourishment, hydration, and genuine rest. Denice walks us through mirror work and compassionate self-talk, the moment she could finally say “I love you” to herself, and the practical art of spotting energetic drains in relationships and workplaces. We explore why boundaries are self-honor, how to listen to your body’s alarms, and what it means to become an energetic match for the life you’re calling in.

We also touch on brain–heart coherence, the “gift in the trauma,” and an aligned approach to manifestation—including the beautiful story of calling in her now-husband after a sacred ceremony and months of inner devotion. Throughout, Denice offers grounded wisdom for women who feel lost, overwhelmed, or unworthy: start with one practice, put yourself first without apology, and let love—without conditions—do its quiet, steady work.

If you’ve ever thought, “I don’t even know what would make me happy,” this episode is your reminder: you are powerful, worthy, and capable of thriving after trauma. 

Links & Resources

• Join Women’s Journey to Happiness (FREE, Nov 3–16): series.deniceburyn.com.
• Connect with Denice on Instagram: @happyhandswholistichealing
• Connect with Denice on Facebook: @happyhandshealing
• FREE Energy Clearing Gift (here)
  
  
• Work with Dr Nat / take the Archetype Quiz: (here)

Content note: This episode references abuse, sexual assault, addiction, and grief. Please listen with care.

If this episode resonates with you then I'd love for you to hit SUBSCRIBE so you can keep updated with each new episode as soon as it's released and we'd be most grateful if you would give us a RATING as well. You can also find me on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/drnatgreen/ or on Facebook https://www.facebook.com/DrNatalieGreen

Intro and Outro music: Inspired Ambient by Playsound.

Disclaimer: This podcast is intended for educational purposes only. It is not intended to be deemed or treated as psychological treatment or to replace the need for psychological treatment.

Transcript

Dr Nat Green: 0:01

Welcome to the Growing Tall Poppies Podcast. I'm your host, Dr. Nat Green, and I'm so excited to have you join me as we discuss what it means to navigate your way through post-traumatic growth and not just survive, but to thrive after trauma. Through our podcast, we will explore ways for you to create a life filled with greater purpose, self-awareness, and a deep inner peace. Through integrating the many years of knowledge and professional experience, as well as the wisdom of those who have experienced trauma firsthand. We'll combine psychology accelerated approaches. Coaching and personal experience to assist you, to learn, to grow and to thrive. I hope to empower you to create deeper awareness and understanding and stronger connections with yourself and with others, whilst also paving the way for those who have experienced trauma and adversity to reduce their suffering and become the very best versions of themselves. In order to thrive. Thank you so much for joining me on today's episode. Welcome back. I'm really excited and grateful today to bring you our next guest on the Growing Tall Poppies podcast. It's my absolute pleasure and privilege to welcome the most beautiful lady who I met recently through an event she is hosting called Women's Journey to Happiness. And today we get to find out a bit more about the amazing woman behind the interview series and hear. What has led her to this point. So let me start by introducing Denice to you all. Denice Buryn has been. Holistic practitioner, massage therapist, and energy healer for the last decade, helping women to reconnect to their mind, body, soul, and spirit, so that they can live a happy, healthy, more vibrant life. She believes that the mind, body, soul, spirit connection is the key to and the four cornerstones for complete health and happiness, and her soul's mission is all about love. Connection and empowerment. So welcome, Denice. It's so great to have you here.

Denice Buryn: 2:32

Thank you so much, my dear. It's so good to chat with you again.

Dr Nat Green: 2:37

Twice in two days is very exciting, right? So I thought we might just get started with you, giving us a brief introduction of who you are and what you do in the world.

Denice Buryn: 2:52

Sure. Absolutely, I'd love to. So right now I am absolutely passionate about helping women understand their purpose in life because I have found that so many women feel disconnected. They feel like they don't recognize the woman in the mirror. Maybe they don't even particularly like the woman they see in the mirror. And you know, for a lot of women, they've really forgotten. How powerful they are, right? There's that, these abilities that we naturally have, um, that have just been forgotten and. It lends into a little bit of an energy of feeling lost, of overwhelmed of stress and just, you know, riding the shirt tails of, of life without actually really feeling like you're in control. So my passion right now is really bringing women back to that mind body, soul connection, really tapping into their spirit, their purpose in life, helping them understand that they are beautiful souls and that they have a reason for existing. Right. Even if it's just to be existing, to just go through their life and just have their experiences. Not everybody has this grand plan for their life or, you know, maybe a laid out plan of, big monumental changes that they're gonna make. Some, some souls are just here to experience, to learn and to love. And so my mission is really about just reminding women how beautiful they are, how powerful they are, and giving them that. Remembrance back to how truly beautiful they are and how powerful they are.

Dr Nat Green: 4:30

Oh, I love that so much, Denice. And you just articulate it so beautifully and I'm just all as you. Talked about that. I just feel this calm energy emanating from you. And honestly, I know that so many of our listeners will relate to this because as you know, all the guests that I have on have been through significant adversity or trauma, and they're so generous in sharing their story. But we know that everyone who's on here. Their story has led them to where they are today, so,

Denice Buryn: 5:06

absolutely.

Dr Nat Green: 5:07

Yeah. So as you said, I can only, sorry, go ahead. Yeah, as you said, it doesn't mean that you have to have this awful thing or this great big purpose. It can just be to live your best life. Yeah. And really connect with yourself, because that is such an important gift to be able to do that.

Denice Buryn: 5:30

Yes. A gift that many take for granted. Yes. Right. They get so caught up in the doing the, being the, you know, comparison, that they stop giving themselves permission to just be real, to be honest, and to just to follow their heart in what makes them happy. And for, you know, many of the clients I've worked with recently, when I ask them, what does your dream life look like? If, if I could wave a magic wand and poof, here's your dream life. They don't even know. They have no idea because they haven't taken the time, because they don't feel worthy of it. They don't feel like they deserve it. They don't think that they've tried hard enough or that it's meant to be for them. And I counter all of that. I argue with all of that because I'm like, yeah, absolutely you're worthy and it doesn't matter. Where you've been, what you've done, what you lived through, what's happened to you, the experiences you have, all of that's in the past. Mm-hmm. Right? And, and the past. Yes. It teaches us, um, it shapes us. It molds us in a certain way, but that doesn't mean that you don't get the opportunity to remold, reshape, and relearn anything that you want for your future. And so. Part of the reason I, I put together this series on, the, the Women's Journey to Happiness is because with working through my clients, you know, they were like, I don't know what would make me happy and part, so I was like, split in half where I was like, okay, half of me understands that because 20 years ago, that version of me didn't know what happiness was either. And I didn't have a purpose and I didn't have self-worth. I didn't have self-love. I didn't value myself. I didn't even, I was just literally trying to scrape by and raise a child on my own without like killing her. You know what I mean? Like I was, I was responsible for this life to keep it alive, and I had no idea what I was doing. And then there's the other half of me that right now, in this current moment is so epically happy that I'm like, how can you not know? How can you not know what makes you happy? So there's, this split side in me. And so that's why I love,, this conversation and talking about our experiences, our trauma, those things that have happened in our past. Because it doesn't define who you need to be for the rest of your life, it might, hmm. It might put a label, and I hate labels, but it might put a right, it might put a label on a period of your life. Mm-hmm. When you're going through the hard time or the, you knows, SHIT, it might put a label on that time, but labels can be ripped off and labels can be removed just like anything else in life can be broken down and recreated. So can our lives and we don't need to be stuck in the experiences that we had or think that those experiences will keep us in a certain place that we don't deserve or that we're not worthy of reaching for that happiness. So, yeah. I love this work.

Dr Nat Green: 9:00

I can see that and you know, I can see your whole soul and your aura. Everything lights up as you talk about it. And I know that our listeners have pretty much been through some sort of adversity or trauma. And let's be honest, most people in the world have experienced something. Yeah. They don't always acknowledge that. Mm-hmm. And. The comparisonitis that you mentioned often comes in and there's that, uh, but what I went through was nothing compared to this or compared to that. Right. And it's so important that we acknowledge that anything that has created challenges or difficulties or distress for us is important to be aware of, to acknowledge and to. Sit with and work out a way through it. So our listeners, I'm sure will find this conversation very, very valuable as you share this. So, as you know, the people that listen to the podcast have usually been through some sort of significant trauma, and I know you shared a bit with me yesterday that you'd done that. So I'd love for you to share whatever you feel comfortable with about what's happened for you and the backstory of Denice.

Denice Buryn: 10:20

For sure. I am comfortable with it all because as we mentioned, uh, when we were chatting yesterday, you know, I think it's important that we give a voice to those experiences we've had to those traumas. I think it's important that we unmask. Um, these conversations that have been so hush hush for so long, right? Many, many, many, many women have been told not to talk about things, not to bring it up, that it's private family business. You don't, you know, air your laundry out with other people, and it's created this perpetual cycle of people not feeling comfortable or safe enough to talk about their struggles. To talk about their, their trauma, to talk about their experiences. So, I know we only have a short time, so I won't go into everything in detail, but just so that your listeners can have a brief overview mm-hmm. Of where I've come from. And so, you know, keep in mind the work I'm doing now, the, what we've already talked about, where I'm at right now, the happiest in my life that I've ever been. So keep that in mind as we talk about. My journey here, my journey to happiness. So started out, um, we'll skip to like teenage years, right? Uh, first broken heart. Broken heart so bad. But that broken heart was actually really devastating for me, um, as it is for most when you get your first broken heart. And I ended up with a really. Really bad case of depression. Um, back in the mid nineties, it wasn't really talked about, you know, you'd go to your doctor, they tried to give you pills. I think I took those pills maybe for two weeks, but mm-hmm. It didn't resonate with me. I didn't feel like I was broken. I just, I was hurting. I was so hurting and I didn't, A pill didn't seem like, you know, the magic fix. But what happened after that, unfortunately, was that I met. Another boy, who was exciting and adventurous and I was like, oh yeah, this is the perfect way. I'm gonna get over this broken heart. So I got involved in a relationship that was very, very, very, very toxic. Mm-hmm. Um, at that time, again, I'm still trying to heal from, you know, this first teenage, breakup. And so I was not strong in who I was. I wasn't strong in boundaries. I didn't understand anything about my worth or my value. I was feeling very, very, very low. And through this relationship I ended up experiencing. Mental abuse, emotional abuse, physical abuse. Okay. It was a really tumultuous time of about two, maybe three years of just up and down, up and down. Really, really struggling to. Understand how someone can say, you know, I love you, and then hurt you so deeply at the same time. Hmm. It was a really, really, really, really difficult, and when I finally was able to detach myself from that, I felt even more lost and broken than I had before, which led me down a very dark corridor into, uh, I guess a party scene, we'll call it. Mm-hmm. Started going to parties. And I got into drugs. I got into hard drugs, cocaine, um, crack meth, like really hard, icky things. Um, and this was my way of just trying to remove myself from this experience that I was having, right? This, this pain, this, this really, uh. This time of not understanding who I was, what was important to me, or what my purpose even here was, right? I just, I knew nothing. I just knew that it was much easier just to numb it than to work through anything or even recognize that I was hurting, right? Mm-hmm. Yeah. Um, and then I had two really close people to me. Pass away within three months and I hit grief really, really, really hard. One was, my childhood best friend and she actually passed away a week before her wedding, and that really sent me into a spiral. Of even, even darker, even deeper, than I had been before. And I just leaned on all the things that could numb me, block me. I didn't wanna feel, I didn't understand, you know, I was questioning everything. I had been brought up learning'cause I was brought up in the church. And so there, for anybody who's grown up in the church mm-hmm. Um, you understand that there's a certain set of, um. Beliefs, I guess, that you are brought up believing. Mm-hmm. And in my mind, this, this best friend of mine that I grew up with, she was probably the most kindest, most beautiful soul that had in my mind, ever walked the earth. And from the time we were kids, all she ever wanted to do was get married and be a mom. That was her whole goal in life, and here she was a week before her wedding snatched away and I couldn't make sense of it. I couldn't make sense how this. Beautiful soul who had done nothing but served God her whole life and was just a beautiful, beautiful person. How the one thing she desired most in life could be ripped away from her a week before, when she, her, her wedding day basically. And so I began to question, nothing made sense to me anymore. Nothing that I grew up with. None of, none of nothing made sense. I had no foundation, no support, no anything, and. You know, when you're in that place where nothing makes sense, where you are in pain, you are in struggle and you don't know what to do, the easiest thing you can do is mask it. But that comes with its own complications and its own issues. You know, it's, it was a really hard, dark place there. Yeah. Um, from there I continued kind of in the party scene and unfortunately that led me into more, physical relationships with, men. And I unfortunately experienced a couple episodes of rape. Okay. And I experienced a couple times where, you know, my body was just used and abused. I had a very, very, very low, I'm gonna say I had no self-esteem. I won't even say it was low'cause it just, it just didn't exist. I just had such a hard time putting any value to myself and just being used and broken over and over left me in this really, really hard place. And so finally my early twenties, I decided, you know what? I'm either gonna, oh, what I forgot to mention was that I ended up having, um, a couple overdoses, drug overdoses. Okay. Where really there's, there's no reason I should be alive right now with what I went through. Wow. Um, and when I kind of came out of that a little bit, it was like, I, I need to make a huge shift in my life.'cause I'm either gonna end up in jail or I'm gonna end up dead. Mm-hmm. And is that what I want for my life? I don't know, but I. I don't think so. So I ended up moving away from my hometown to get clean, to start over, fresh start, right? The idea of this fresh start always sounds so good, and so I thought, you know what? This is my time. I gotta do it. So with 46 cents in my pocket,

Dr Nat Green: 17:42

oh my goodness. I got on a

Denice Buryn: 17:43

bus and with one bag, and I moved down to Vancouver Island. Mm-hmm. And worked on getting myself clean, getting out of the drug scene. Of course, I met a boy. Oh, of course. Right? Right. Six months later I found out I'm pregnant. Okay. And I. I was in such shock because that was actually the day that I had decided I was gonna break up with my boyfriend at that time because he was also very emotionally manipulative. Um, it wasn't really a healthy relationship. And, and I had been reflecting, you know, the whole month prior thinking, you know, is I'm, this is my start over. Is this really the kind of guy. I wanna have in my life. It's not, so I was actually intending to break up with him that day after my doctor's appointment. And then I find out, oh my God, I'm pregnant, what now? So I chose to stick it out thinking, you know, maybe. This new responsibility would help both of us grow up. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Uh, it didn't work out that way. Um, and I, I ended up leaving him for good. I think when my daughter was just over a year old. I did try and stick it out. We tried all the things, but it just, it wasn't gonna work. So I, now, I'm, you know, on my own in a town where I know really nobody except for the people that I work with, no family or relatives or anything. And, uh, raising a kid on my own. And you wanna talk about trauma? Mm. I feel like anybody who's ever raised a child on their own deserves a F'ing medal man, because it is one of the, if not hardest jobs on the planet to juggle all the things you wear, all the hats, and especially when you have no support doing it. Um. It's a very, very tough goal. Yes. Especially with

Dr Nat Green: 19:40

no support system, as you said. Yeah. So with a whole different area, completely different town. But yeah, I noticed, you know, having the insight that despite everything, all the experiences, you wanted more for yourself, so you made those choices. That's. Amazing. Yeah. So keep going. You know what, he was struggling as a single mom. Yep.

Denice Buryn: 20:04

Yeah. What really started that little bit of a flame inside me was that I got a job. It was like a professional job. And I used say that with quotes, if you guys can't see my fingers. Um, I was selling insurance at the time, so, um, before my mat leave, I was working at seven 11 as a cashier. Woo-hoo. Right? Um, and then I went on my mat leave. I babysat for a couple years and then I was like, okay, if I'm gonna leave this guy, I need like. I need a real job. I need a job that's gonna support me and my child. So I ended up getting this job, selling insurance at a bank. And so I had to get like the fancy clothes. Yeah, the high heels. I had to wear stockings, all the things. Right? Yeah. So it was like this upgrade of status in my head. Yeah. Um, which also began to uplevel a little bit of my expectations of myself. Okay. Right. And the people that I worked with were so kind and they laughed. And they were nice. Like these were all things that for the last, you know, 5, 6, 7 years hadn't really been a part of my life. It was just a whole lot of dark, dark, dark, and people using you, abusing you. And now all of a sudden I'm in this environment where people were so nice. Like I can, I can still remember that, that just, that people were so nice and it made me realize there are still good people out there. Mm. With all the things I've been through, with all of the things that have happened to me. There are still really nice people out in the world, and it began to raise my expectations. Mm-hmm. On, okay, well this is what I need to be, I need to be a good, solid person. Mm-hmm. Then I had to move away, unfortunately, from that town, from that area of Canada, just because it was really expensive. It's kind of like a retirement area, if you will. So everything was really, really expensive. And as a single parent, I just, I couldn't afford to make it. So I ended up moving out here to Alberta, um, at the invite of my sister and my brother-in-law who lived here. And again, it was the epic. Start over, right? I couldn't afford to live where I was. I just could not, not make ends meet. And so here I was five-year-old child and I'm about to start all over again. So I did packed up the moving van, drove here all by myself, got a job, was living with my sister. And then I ended up having a little bit of a disagreement with my brother-in-law because he was trying to tell me how to live my life. And I was like, it's my life. Thank you very much. And so we just started to butt heads. So I moved out. Again, kind of on my own all over again, and I got a job working for a farmer, which was something I knew nothing about. I had no experience at all with farming, but it was a job and I didn't care. I was gonna do anything, anything to put food on the table, and I began to heal through that job.

Dr Nat Green: 23:04

Okay.

Denice Buryn: 23:04

Because this farmer was a grain and cattle farmer, but mostly on the grain. I got to be outside every day, so I'm in the sunshine. I'm getting fresh oxygen. I'm getting movement in my body. Yeah. And I was so in touch with the land. Mm. And I know that might sound bizarre to say, but I can honestly say that nature started to heal me without me even knowing it was happening. Mm. And it was such a fantastic job for most of the part, the work I loved. I loved working hard. I loved getting out and getting my hands dirty, doing all the things I can drive anything with, you know, I have my class one, I can, I can haul anything. I can drive anything, but my boss was a little bit of an asshole. Mm. Uh, he was a very, very, very toxic person for me. We fought a lot, especially if there was alcohol involved. Um, you know, on the farm sometimes, no, after the end of a big day you have a drink or two or whatever, and we would end up fighting and then I would come to work the next day and he'd still be angry about what we were fighting about the day before, kind of holding it over my head and it just became kind of like a whatever. But then, um, it got worse. And it got worse. And it got worse. And it was usually if I happen to break something, like, I don't know, like when you work around machinery, you know that shit's gonna break. You gotta, you gotta understand that about machinery. However, you know, sometimes you also just do stupid things as humans. Sometimes you just make a mistake. And so on the days, if I would break something or do something wrong, he would get really, upset with me and, and kinda hold it over my head for a couple days and it just, it didn't feel good. It didn't feel, like a happy, thriving environment. I guess. I loved the job. I just, the relationship between me and, and my boss wasn't good. However, I felt like I needed this job because it was the most money I had ever made, and it was the only reason that I was surviving here on my own. Yeah. And so I started drinking. Mm-hmm. I started drinking to numb my reception to his anger. Mm-hmm. To his displeasure, whatever you wanna call it. And I started drinking a lot. Mm-hmm. Because if I was numb. Then I didn't feel mm-hmm. The anger and the disappointment or whatever. Right. It was just easier if I was drinking a little bit, and this was really before I understood anything about energy. Knowing what I know now, obviously I had an issue with boundaries. Obviously I had an issue with clearing up energy of myself, but I knew none of this at the time. So as much as nature was trying to heal me. I was sabotaging my own health by partaking in in alcohol, which led to a fairly serious addiction. Mm-hmm. Which also led into a general anxiety disorder. Okay. So everything, as we know with trauma, one thing piles on top of another thing on top of another thing and on top of another thing. And when you do nothing about any of those layers, yeah. It doesn't go anywhere. Nope, it's still inside.

Dr Nat Green: 26:30

Stuck in there. And it

Denice Buryn: 26:31

was like, it was perking and perking and perking inside me, and I wasn't listening. I wasn't listening to any of the cues in my body. I didn't know anything about listening to my body. And then I had one pivotal night where I drank too much and I got pulled over and I lost my driver's license. Mm-hmm. My jobs, I had two of them at the time. Were driving jobs.

Dr Nat Green: 26:58

Okay.

Denice Buryn: 26:58

I, my life, my livelihood depended on me being able to drive and I've now just lost my driver's license. Yeah. And this one mistake totally upended my life. Mm-hmm. At that time, in my mind, I saw no possible good out of this.

Dr Nat Green: 27:20

No, of course.

Denice Buryn: 27:20

Looking back now, that's the period of time when I decided to go back to school. And that was when I decided I'm gonna go for massage therapy. Mm-hmm. I was seeing a massage therapist and she said, you should go be a holistic practitioner. I think you have what it would take. This is a school I went to. It was really fabulous. You should look into this. Mm-hmm. So in this time off where I wasn't able to actually go to work, I decided to go back to school, took out some student loans, and I started learning about the human body. But I also started learning about energy.

Dr Nat Green: 27:51

Yes.

Denice Buryn: 27:52

Game changer for me. Hmm. Absolutely. When I started realizing how much energy of everybody else I had taken on my whole life, of all of the experiences, of all of the traumas, of all of the horrible things that I had been through, that I had done, that I had said, all those versions of me that had done all these wrong things. It was just energy and I was holding all of that inside my body, and I woke up one morning and I actually got violently Ill, like I, I vomited. Before I was even able to get outta bed. Mm-hmm. And I was like, what is that? Like I, I was like, did I eat something bad? Like, we all know what food poisoning is like, right. Like, I was like, oh my God, what did I eat yesterday? I feel so gross. But I had to go to work. So off to work, I go, and this started to happen every day for a couple weeks, as soon as my eyes would come awake. And I'm like, okay, I'm waking up. I immediately had to throw up. Mm-hmm. And I started feeling like. You know, on the inside, the inside I started feeling like my body was shutting down. Mm-hmm. I wasn't able to keep food down after like the noon dinner.'cause on the farm we had like a big noon dinner. Mm-hmm. Um, usually I would eat dinner and then I'd have to go outside and I'd have to throw up again. Like I wasn't able to keep any food down. It was like my body was literally shutting down. I had chronic diarrhea, I had this anxiety disorder that was like out of control. And I was like, I don't know what's going on, but I need to make some serious changes. Mm-hmm. Like, I feel dead on the inside. I have no emotions, I have no connection to anything. I feel like I have no life purpose, and here I'm learning about this energy, but I don't feel it. Mm. Like I don't, I, I couldn't make sense of anything. And so I decided, well, I guess we're gonna have to make some changes. So I quit drinking, I changed my diet. I started pounding back, you know, four liters of water a day. Mm-hmm. Um, and what really, really made the difference for me is I started meditating every day. Okay. This amazing meditation that I'd heard about for so many years, knew nothing really about, but I started following this lady online and she did it. And I'm like, well, you know what? If she can do it, I can do it. So I just followed along with what she said, and as I began to meditate every day. I began to invite in forgiveness. I began to invite in compassion. Mm-hmm. And I began to invite in love again, which had been so absent from my life for so many years. And the most amazing beautiful thing happened is that I was able to truly let go. Of everything that had ever happened to me. All the abuse, the physical abuse, the mental abuse, the rapes, right. The, the child abuse when I was younger, all of it, all of it. I just, I met it in an honest place of love and I just was like, I'm done. I'm tired of carrying Yeah. This weight with me, this burden with me. Mm-hmm. Like it, it's truly time just to let this go. Yeah, it happened to me. Yeah, it was shitty. But that doesn't mean that it, I need to carry it with me and wear it like a badge or wear it like, you know, an armor that's gonna protect me from ever experiencing anything new. I deserved to have a happy life, and these are the things I started to tap into as I was meditating every day. My soul just kind of came alive and it started talking to me about what it truly wanted in life. Yes. And so. That was really the pivotal point of when I started to shift was I learned about energy. I learned how to clear my energy every day, how important it is to clear your energy every day, especially if you are in a toxic situation like work home. Parents, friends, even sometimes can be very, very toxic for you, and, and you'll know they're toxic because you feel very tired. After associating with them, right? You get on the phone with them, you go have a, a, um, you know, tea or coffee with them, and you just feel energetically drained after, or you feel really, really heavy, right? This, this is a sign that you are taking on other people's energy. So I learned how to clear my energy every day. I meditated every day. I just started changing everything that my intuition told me to do. I watched a lot of webinars about health and all the amazing things the body does. Plus I was now, you know, I'd graduated from school by this time, and so I was working with clients and I started to see how, when we talked about the emotions that we store inside the body, when we can actually truly just acknowledge them, right? Let them come into our awareness, work with them, work to start releasing them, and inviting in forgiveness and love, the transformations they started having was. Amazing. Mm. I was like, wow, if I can do it, anybody can do it. Because if anybody has lived through anything like what I had lived through, you know, it was possible for anybody to, to change their life. So I know that was like a really long explanation for where I got to where I am, but it's fabulous. You know, it's like, knows

Dr Nat Green: 33:22

Yeah. That you can so openly share that and talk about it. And just help other people know that no matter what you've been through, you can come out the other side and it's worth investing in yourself to do that because look at you now,

Denice Buryn: 33:41

right? Look at me now.

Dr Nat Green: 33:43

I know.

Denice Buryn: 33:44

Amazing. You knows a gift. We talked a little bit about this yesterday. It didn't happen overnight. No, and it didn't happen by me just sitting back and expecting something amazing to happen to me. I had to do the work. Yeah, I put the time in. Mm-hmm. I spent many, many, many, many months, I won't say in solitude, but when I began to truly understand that the company you keep plays a big part in the energy that you have, I started to really question who deserves my time?

Dr Nat Green: 34:22

Beautiful question.

Denice Buryn: 34:24

Right. Such, not everybody deserves your time. No. Not everybody deserves something of you. And we've been brought up in this culture that says everybody else comes first. Mm-hmm. And if there's time at the end of the day, then there's time for you. Well, there's never time at the end of the day. And unless you make the time to put yourself first, to put yourself a priority. You end up at the bottom of the list and everybody else gets served and all that happens is that you get depleted and you get depleted and you get depleted. And I was at that like. Depleted point for so, so long that all of a sudden as I was doing this inner work of meditation and energy clearing every day and, you know, feeding my body whole foods, you know, I cut out the junk food and the processed food and like all the crap, I caught it all out and I was drinking water and just nurturing this beautiful vessel that I had. And I can honestly say. At that time I would, I could not look, I mean, I couldn't do mirror work. I dunno if anybody, you know, listening knows what mirror work is, but there's no way that I could look myself in the face, in the eyeballs and say, I love you. I'm so proud of you. Good work. I couldn't do it. And I can't remember who I was listening to. I dunno if it was Louise Hay or somebody was talking about mirror work, and I'm like, you know. I'm gonna give that a go, right? I'm, I was open for trying anything because anything had to be better than where I had been that low, like rock bottom, right? So I can remember the first time I, you know, go out into my bathroom and I'm looking myself in the eyeballs and I'm like, I, and I just like burst out crying. Like I could not get the words out. I love you. I'm so proud of you. I see you girl, like you have been through the hoops, but you're still here. You're still alive. I had two drug overdoses. There's really no reason I should be alive, but yet I'm still here. So what purpose is my life? What? What is the purpose of my life? And it took me maybe a couple months. Before I could really honestly look myself in the eyes every day and say, you are fantastic. I love you so much, and you are gonna have a fabulous day. And I meant it. I actually truly meant it. It wasn't just, you know, fake it till you make it kind of thing. I really, really meant it. And this, I was all about affirmations, right? Writing things on sticky notes. And I had them all over my house. I had my top 12 values all over my house. I had all of these little reminders around my place. And one quote, um, I think it was a Wayne Dire, quote, mm-hmm. Was Thank you universe for this day, for my life, for my body, for my loved ones, and for the opportunity to be of service. Thank you, thank you, thank you. And when I heard him say that on a podcast or something, something in me was like, Hmm, well that kind of covers everything My day, you know, my loved ones, my, my body, my life. Like, yeah, that covers everything. So let's try that. I'm gonna try that. So I wrote it out and I had it on my bathroom mirror for about four years. Every time I went into my bathroom, I said it in the morning, midday, nighttime. It didn't matter if I was going into my bathroom. I said that quote. It took me much like the mirror work, it took me a little time before I could truly feel that gratitude. But when I met it, when I truly began to reflect, like, look how far I've come, my kid is still alive. Woo. Yay. Bonus. I'm still alive. Woo hoo. Go me right. You were winning. I ruined. I was totally winning for the first time because there had been so much failure in my past. Right? And it just, it always seemed like I was stuck in this perpetual loop of failure, failure, failure. I'd get up and then crash down. I'd get up, and then I'd crash down. And for the first time I really just felt like I was happy I was alive. I was so deeply connected. I. And that was kind of the beginning of like my epic just like rise up because it got even better from there. Um, I learned how to really tap into my emotions.

Dr Nat Green: 39:08

Yeah,

Denice Buryn: 39:09

I learned how to, um. Get my brain and heart. I think Dr. Dispenza calls it the brain heart coherence. Mm-hmm. I really started to understand the importance of visualizing. Yes. But also feeling into what you're visualizing. Right. Tapping into the feeling of things, not just thinking about it, visualizing it.'cause I'm a very visual person. That's one of my Claires. Um, but. Really feeling it. So I went through this manifestation course that my friend was, was offering, and it was fantastic. But I did this little ceremony. It was uh, december of 2020 when we, right when we were moving into the age of Aquarius, that December 21st was like this really powerful portal day. And I'm like, I'm gonna do this special little sacred ceremony. Uh, so I got out all my medicines, I got my sage, my sweet grass, my um, cedar, I got some tobacco. I made this little, you know, sacred fire. And I had written out a list, a very, very detailed list mm-hmm. Of what my perfect partner. Needed to be, if I was gonna give up my single life that I was so in love with all of a sudden. Yeah. Um, I was just thriving in my solitude and, and just in, you know, in my little acreage that I had. It was magical. It was, it was so good. I was so happy if I was gonna give that up, the person that I met had to be pretty fantastic. Yeah, definitely. Like, fantastic. So I wrote out this list. It was a like double sided page. Of course. It was exactly what my perfect partner had to be like down to detail. Mm-hmm. Like I wanted him to have long enough hair that I could run my fingers to. I didn't, you know, there's nothing wrong with, with. Thinning hair, but just for my perfect partner, I wanted him to have hair that I could run my fingers through, right? Just all the things. Um, I didn't want to have to clean off, pee off the toilet seat ever. Like, you know, I got very, very detailed to what exactly this perfect partner had to be. I went outside, it was dead of winter, or I guess the, the start of winter, um, in December here. I burnt my list and I just gave it to source to the universe and I said, this or something better. If I'm meant to meet somebody, it has to be this guy that I've just written this two pages about or something better, and I burnt it and I let go. I just trusted that if it was meant to happen, it would, it would, it would happen. I'd lived in Alberta already for seven years, didn't think I was ever gonna find anybody that actually, you know. Came close to this list, but I'm like, whatever miracles can happen. Mm-hmm. And then this was during the world shutdown years, as I call it. Right? Mm-hmm. We all know what those were. Yeah. And, uh, finances were tight because as a massage therapist, my business had been shut down. It wasn't allowed to work.

Dr Nat Green: 42:03

Yeah.

Denice Buryn: 42:03

Single mom back on that, you know,

Dr Nat Green: 42:06

money,

Denice Buryn: 42:07

stress train.

Dr Nat Green: 42:08

Yeah.

Denice Buryn: 42:09

And I decided to go work in the spring for, a company that basically they haul fertilizer to the farmers around here. So I had a class one, I could do the dangerous goods job, no problem. So I decided to take on this job just to get a little bit of money coming in that spring. And this was four months after I did my sacred ceremony. And I went to work that very first day and there was a man there who immediately caught my attention and we had to work together all that day doing whatever we were doing. And by the end of the day I was like, you know when, um, like your temperature is just like super, super hot and you're just like giggling, like you feel like a little school girl that's just like, he, he, he like, it was so bizarre. It was so bizarre. But I felt just this amazing supernatural connection to this guy. Mm. It was so crazy. Um. Three years later, we're now married.

Dr Nat Green: 43:10

That's amazing, isn't it?

Denice Buryn: 43:12

It was truly phenomenal about when you let go of the struggle. Yeah. And when you just put your trust in the universe that whatever you desire, if you are an energetic match for it, if you are ready and you are prepared, watch out. Mm-hmm. It's coming. Yes. If you are an energetic match for what you are designing for your life, it will happen for you instantly. And this is how quantum leaping can work too, right? Yes. Jumping timelines is when you are an energetic match for what you are creating for yourself. And so when I reflect back on the journey. Right. All the things that happened first to me, that made me not so happy. And then the catalystic points, you know, the two really major traumatic points of my life that shifted my direction exponentially to where I am now. It's been an amazing journey. Yeah. There's been ups and downs for sure. That's called human existence. Mm-hmm. Right. There's always gonna be the ups and downs. Definitely. But. It's been such a beautiful learning lesson when you can actually see the low times as lessons and not make it mean anything about anything. It's just an experience that I'm going through and that's okay.

Dr Nat Green: 44:36

I love that so much because I know we talked yesterday and I often talk on my podcast and, and some people struggle when they first hear this. It's about what is the, the gift in the trauma. Yeah. And the lessons from the trauma. And we are not able to see them until we're ready. Like you said, you have to be open and ready to experience that and feel that. So you've beautifully shared that, those big pivotal turning points. So if you could share one thing with our listeners that you think is key to help them move from trauma into post-traumatic growth, what would it be?

Denice Buryn: 45:24

I think the biggest thing that helped me move finally into that post-trauma growth was bringing in a practice for just me and for the first time in my life. Deciding that I had to be the most important person in my life. I had to say no to absolutely everything that didn't align with me first, and not in a selfish way. What I mean by that is I had to say no. When people asked too much of me

Dr Nat Green: 46:11

Yeah.

Denice Buryn: 46:11

When they were asking me to do things without any, um, reciprocal gratitude. Mm-hmm. Right. They just expected you to do things like, you know, the job I had, he just expected me to work seven days a week, 16 hours a day. Hmm. So I missed out on my child's youth basically from the age of five to the age of 12. I missed out on her entire childhood. Because I was at work at the farm seven days a week, 12, 13, 14 hours a day. Because he expected of me, I could have said no, but I didn't. And so as you shift into this. Um, period of time where you begin to heal, you have to put yourself first. And when you say the words self-care, a lot of people go, ah, self-care.

Dr Nat Green: 47:03

Yeah, exactly.

Denice Buryn: 47:04

So don't call it that. Just don't call it that, call it something else. But when you truly begin to respect yourself. Hmm. When you truly begin to offer unconditional love to yourself, which means love, without conditions, it doesn't matter who I am, what I do, where I've been, what's happened to me, I love me anyway. And I love me, most of all. You know, there was even a time in my solitude where I pulled my kid from all of her activities, like her afterschool activities, because I was so exhausted. That having to go, you know, drive her to here and drive her to there and go do that, it just added more stress and more stress and it added on more of the rush. And when we can't eat a healthy dinner because we have to pick up something on the way because it's an hour to get to swimming lessons from after school. And then, you know, after that we have to go do this. And like it was just like, blah enough, it's not going to kill my kid to go one year. Without swimming lessons, or one year without karate, or one year without soccer, one year without baseball, your kids will survive. They're fine, they'll do it. I had to put myself first and what felt right and good to me, and that was really pivotal in allowing myself that space to heal, giving myself that quiet time. Meeting myself in meditation, like absolutely i'm a meditation teacher now, and I can tell you that there is a meditation style for everybody. It's not all just sitting and trying to quiet your mind, like no meditating can be going out for a walk. It can be playing with your kids. It can be going out and riding a quad down the trails. It can be whatever you need it to be. The whole point of meditation is just getting quiet with yourself. Yeah. And just allowing yourself, your soul. To talk to you, but you're gonna get quiet long enough to hear what it's trying to tell you. Yes. So that,

Dr Nat Green: 49:12

that one's a challenge for me. It's nice to hear that meditation doesn't have to be sitting there,'cause my mind never turns off and goes quiet. So,

Denice Buryn: 49:20

no. And in fact, that can be a meditation in itself is inviting all those thoughts. Like not shaming it saying I'm doing it wrong, if I can't shut my mind off, no. Invite them in and then you can just like, make little folders inside your mind and be like, oh, that's a thought coming in about work. I'm just gonna put that thought over in that folder and I'm gonna let that go for now. What else you got? And like, encourage your brain to give you all that, right? So there's, there's different ways that you can meditate. It's really, truly just coming back to yourself, beginning to listen to your body, listen to your emotions, listen to your energy. Um. And giving yourself a little bit of love and compassion. Absolutely. You gotta pour in the love. I love that so much. And I think, you know, when you talked about people think, oh, self-care. But really as you said that what came up for me was that real self-honoring. So that honoring of self that I felt that really deeply. I was like, really it, it's about owning you. Putting boundaries in place and honoring yourself with self-love and self-compassion. So, ugh. Absolutely. Thank you for sharing that. And I know our listeners will, you know,'cause often we talk about self-care and it's that, ugh, it's almost cringe. I think, like at times, I think that's like the mainstream word of it now. It's, it's become so overused. Yeah, yeah. That, you know, call it what you want. The whole point of it is just putting yourself first and nurturing. Yes, and allowing yourself the time to rest because often self-care, self-love, self-nurturing, self-honoring. It's truly about giving yourself time to rest. Because we're in a society of stress of go, go, go, go, go, push, push, push, push, stuff, stuff, stuff, stuff all the time. And we don't give ourselves enough time. We don't give the body our energy, our emotions. Time to breathe and, and to relax. Right. The body feels unsafe. It feels pushed, it feels mm-hmm. You know, stressed out all the time. It's kinda, we talked, I talked a little about like the trauma, like layer trauma, layers of trauma. Yes. Same thing happens for stress. It gets layered on, layered on, layered on until you have a breaking point. Mm-hmm. For some that, that's like a psychotic break sometimes, right? Mm-hmm. It's, it's can be that severe because you're just so overwhelmed and stressed. Mm-hmm. So we gotta dial it back. We gotta dial it back, and we gotta give the body and make it okay. Make it okay to have those days of rest.

Dr Nat Green: 51:52

Yeah. That permission, again, like you said, right. That permission is so important. Yeah. So I know you've got lots going on now with your women's journey to happiness. Yeah. So, and, and all the other amazing work that you do. So as we move to wrapping this conversation up, where can our listeners find out more about you and find you online and share the work that you do?

Denice Buryn: 52:16

Yeah, absolutely. Um, so I'm not like a huge social media person, but I do have a little bit of a presence on, uh, Facebook and Instagram. So Facebook is just,@happyhandshealing. Mm-hmm. Um, on Instagram it's.@Happyhandswholistic healing, and wholistic is spelled with a w. Mm-hmm. Um, for the series, my Women's Journey to Happiness, it's completely free if you wanna sign up for this series. Um, and I do recommend, especially since, uh, our beautiful host over there is one of my amazing speakers, definitely wanna come check out her interview. Um, yeah. 14 days of, of listening to amazing healers, um, visionaries. Just speaking about, you know. Different tools, tips, wisdom, nuggets and stuff that you can get to help on your journey back to happiness. So, um, that is going to be at https://series.deniceburyn.com And Denice is spelled D-E-N-I-C-E. Burin is B-U-R-Y-N. So I'm sure it'll be in the show notes. You can check those out, but yes, sir Denice bein.com. And yeah, come sign up. Come get a, a little bit of, um. A variety. There's a wide variety of expertise and wisdom that gets shared among these series. So you just, you take what resonates with you and you leave the rest. Not everything is gonna resonate with you and that's totally cool, but there might be something there for you, something that can help you move into that post-trauma healing, that, that wellness, that, exponential growth.

Dr Nat Green: 54:03

Oh no. I'm really excited and I honestly am so honored to be a part of your amazing interview series, so I'll definitely put that link in the show notes and I hope that many of our listeners will, will join us. And what date does that start, Denice?

Denice Buryn: 54:18

It starts on Monday, November 3rd. So it's November 3rd to the 16th. So we've got one more week to sign up. Um, and then we begin.

Dr Nat Green: 54:28

Oh, very exciting. What I like to do at the end, I like to leave you with a question. What do you think your younger self would think of what you're doing now and what you've achieved?

Denice Buryn: 54:47

How young?

Dr Nat Green: 54:50

As young as you want, wherever your mind you went.

Denice Buryn: 54:52

I, I, I joke because I just feel like, um, sometimes when I look back, when I think about my story, uh, it feels like I've lived five or six or seven different lifetimes in this lifetime. So I'm like, well, which version of my younger self, because there's been like so many, my younger self is so proud of me. Yeah, because I finally learned my value. Mm, I finally learned how to love, how to love myself more than anything. Growing up, it was more about loving everybody else and serving everybody and being of service. I am that. I absolutely love everybody and I am full on about service, but I love myself most. I follow and I honor my heart, and I just know that my younger self is so proud of me for not giving up and for continuing to try. No matter how hard it was. I never gave up,

Dr Nat Green: 56:02

thank goodness. Right. Thank goodness you didn't because you just have so much. What a gift you are to the world. And you gave me goosebumps. Thank you. Said that. I was like, oh my goodness. I honestly feel so honored to have had you here today and, and to share this.

Denice Buryn: 56:21

Thank you Natalie.

Dr Nat Green: 56:21

Beautiful conversation with our audience, so thank you.

Denice Buryn: 56:25

You're welcome. It's been such an honor to be here and to experience your space

Dr Nat Green: 56:31

and we look forward to, yeah. Getting everyone to know you even more on the interview series.

Denice Buryn: 56:37

Absolutely. I look forward to having you all come. Enjoy. Thanks, Denice. Learn.

Dr Nat Green: 56:45

Bye for now.

Denice Buryn: 56:46

Much love.

Dr Nat Green: 56:51

Thank you for joining me in this episode of Growing Tall Poppies. It is my deepest hope that today's episode may have inspired and empowered you to step fully into your post-traumatic growth, so that you can have absolute clarity around who you are, what matters the most to you, and to assist you to release your negative emotions. And regulate your nervous system so you can fully thrive. New episodes are published every Tuesday, and I hope you'll continue to join us as we explore both the strategies and the personal qualities required to fully live a life of post-traumatic growth and to thrive. So if it feels aligned to you and really resonates, then I invite you to hit subscribe and it would mean the world to us. If you could share this episode with others who you feel may benefit too, you may also find me on Instagram at Growing Tall Poppies and Facebook, Dr. Natalie Green. Remember, every moment is an opportunity to look for the lessons and to learn and increase your ability to live the life you desire and deserve. So for now, stay connected. Stay inspired. Stand tall like the tall poppy you are, and keep shining your light brightly in the world. Bye for now